Yellow-bellied Varmint

My wife is trilingual. As an Ecuadorian, her first language is Spanish but she speaks fluent English and German. This does not mean she always understands me or the odd American idioms I spout out. I once attempted to calm her frustrations by suggesting she not get “bent out of shape”. She heard “banana shake” and the conversation thankfully turned to desserts. After a close encounter with a Black Bear in Yosemite National Park, I pointed at a bird across the meadow and said “Hey a cowbird”. My wife replied “you’re not a coward – you got very close to that bear.”

I’m not a coward, although as a child I did react to a fire alarm in our house by fleeing and yelling for someone to save my sister. Labels can be hard to take and tough to shake. Yosemite Sam indoctrinated a legion of Loony Tunes fans to believe that a Yellow-bellied Marmot (Marmota flaviventris) or varmint is a coward. Having never seen one I assumed this to be true. I also believed that all gunpowder trails lead to a shed full of TNT.

 I spotted my first Yellow-bellied Marmot on a walk in the woods in Sequoia National Park where the whistling rodent stood tall on a rocky perch and scouted its surroundings. The plump, fuzzy ground squirrel never backed down but darted from perch to perch whistling to other Marmots unseen to me.

Although marmots are cousins to the eastern Woodchuck (Marmota monax), they are social and live in colonies. One individual often gets sentinel duty and watches for danger while the others forage. The shrill this “whistle pig” was producing apparently had the effect of an alarm and sent the other marmots into their underground burrow, which in some colonies can contain over 200 feet of passages.

In the high Sierras of California, marmots hibernate from September to May but if this Yellow-bellied individual was shaking off its eight month slumber you could never tell. It had all the energy and excitability of Yosemite Sam with a stick of dynamite in his pants. It was endearing to watch this individual protecting the colony. It’s time to rethink the “yellow-belly” label and I guess I better go save my sister. 

Carter's Tern-about

When a 20-something woman began running down Barefoot Beach I took notice. In front of her was a flock of 25-30 Royal Terns and assorted gulls and her intent was obvious - get every single bird to fly. As bird after bird took off to avoid the rampaging woman in a sun dress, Ma-Le suggested that we (including my sister Tara and family) get up and rampage toward the woman. I would have done it if I wasn't tired, comfortable, lazy and just too embarrassed to perform this display of karmic balance. I wish I had - I was annoyed - the woman not only disrupted our peaceful setting but when birds are disturbed like this they waste energy. One person doing this might not impact them much but repeated disruptions?

The woman and friends passed. The birds settled back down and relaxed and than my nephew decided to go for a stroll of his own.

Ah - some day I'll explain it all to him.....

Family Vacation: Ahh, Venice

The following is a continuation of Tiffany's flashback tour of Venice, Florida where we grew up. Here are some of her photos from way back when and from now.

Venice Avenue 1973 - Mom, a monkey, me (with hair) and little sister Tara in the stroller - she kinda looks like another monkey.
Venice Avenue 2009 with my niece and nephew. (was it coincidence that Tiffany took the photo in the exact same spot?)

Tiffany at Munday Park in 1970 - My father helped get this park created and Tiffany had a sense of ownership because of that. We lived a few houses down and when she would come here to play - she'd be miffed if other kids were on "her" playground. A two year old with a sense of entitlement!Tiffany's daughter Abigail at Munday Park in 2009

Dad, a monkey, Mom (prego with Tiffany), cousin Bill and Aunt Anne at the Venice Depot in 1968.

The Venice Depot in 2009 - now part of the Heritage Trail for bikers and hikers.

Tiffany at our old Groveland Avenue house in Venice. I was an infant - I don't remember those dogs. Amazing that there are still some classic old houses that they haven't torn down to make way for cookie cutter homes.Gunther Gebel-Williams - was considered one of the greatest animal trainers of all time and perfromed for the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey® Circus in the The Greatest Show On Earth®. He was Venice's favorite son and a world class entertainer. Regardless of my opinions of circuses today, as children we found his show entertaining. He was probably the first person I understood to be "famous" and our parents knew him! He passed away a few years ago and is memorialized below in an appropriately flamboyant statue with a surprisingly defined cod piece. He was inducted into the International Circus Hall of Fame in 1999.

And the last picture is for Jack and Josie who think "monkey diapers" are funny. And really who doesn't? Here's a picture of me in 1971 - in a diaper on Venice Beach. Had I known Tiffany had this picture I would have posed for a picture with me in a diaper on Venice Beach in 2009.

EDITED (3/4/2009) - Malena suggested I post this picture of me in a diaper from 2007. I am the SMURF on the left. Baby New Year in the middle and Ashley Hayes Traut on the far right.

Balloons for Grandma

Lie to your kids. It amuses me.

I was hiking in the Everglades two weeks ago and spotted a shiny object floating between two Cypress trees deep in the far reaches of the swamp. It was a Mylar balloon and the metallic exterior shimmered and reflected the rare sunbeam that broke through the dense forest canopy. It reminded me that no place is far enough away from the hand of humanity.

This is what happens to some of the balloons that get away from kids. My niece lost a balloon a few months ago and my sister told her not to cry - the balloon was floating away and grandma would get it. Presumably my sister thinks our mother lives in space since passing on 2 years ago. The situation repeated itself a few months later and Tara reminded Peyton once again that the balloon was headed up to Grandma. When Peyton lost another balloon recently Tara once again calmed the greasy-fingered kid and told her not to worry - and you know the rest. The apparently agitated three year old had had enough of this explanation and demanded to know what Grandma was doing with all of her balloons. I can only hope she's having a rockin' party.

I think parents feel the need to make up the balloon story for a few reasons. The first being that many balloons float back to earth where lucky little kids get to frolic with your kid's lost balloon. Explain that to a kid.

Another is that many balloons return to earth as litter - disrupting a wilderness slog through the swamp or falling into an ocean where a confused turtle will attempt to eat it - thinking it's a jellyfish. Telling your kid that Crush choked on their balloon is generally upsetting.

And finally - the idea that an 8-armed alien holding a bouquet of your kid's balloon on the moon is simply creepy and would freak them out.

So instead - lie to them - it works for so many other things. And hey Peyton - you keep making that face and you'll turn into a monkey.

Happy 66th Birthday Mom - wherever you are.

New England Rewind 2008

I can't be everywhere, but during my latest trip to Vermont and Massachusetts I feel like I tried. Regardless, I couldn't visit everyone, so a recap will have to do. The purpose of the trip was to fulfill my best man duties at Sean and April's wedding on 8/8/2008 in Bennington, VT. Followed by a trip to Sharon, MA for Tiffers big 40th b-day with the family. So with apologies to everyone I couldn't see, this is what I saw - in my New England Rewind 2008 The Bennington Monument in Vermont - site of Sean and April's wedding
It rained when MaLe and I arrived and rained all day Friday. Thanks to Mandy's magic, her gift to Sean was a spell to clear the sky for the 30 minute outdoor ceremony. It worked. The rain stopped and resumed shortly after heading inside.

The lovely bride and groom
If you're going to do a best man toast, do it right. With the Bee Gees in the background and me with sassy pose (and one too many drinks in me), I gave my off the cuff speech which drew one audible gasp but thankfully ended with laughter and applause. I have no idea what I said. The bride made me wear pink.

But the bride may have said something to the groom a bit later about the speech.There's no intended innuendo in this picture of the monument.I'm genuinely happy for Sean and April and I meant all the good stuff I said. I miss the old days, but wish you well on the new days ahead. Hopefully it won't be another 15 months till we see each other again.

Got to spend a little time with Bill. Not enough time. He was nice enough to come get us in Bennington and travel with us east to visit Tara, Peyton and Carter.


Is Peyton not the cutest?

A trip to visit Tiffer and family is rarely without mischief. Why an 11-year old knows when to hold'em and when to fold'em is beyond me. He also knows when to run.
This is how you rock out on Guitar Hero"
Jim cookin' the dogs and burgers for the brood.
Aunt "Ga" and baby Carter
What's the problem Peyton? Why the face? (Hi Stelly - you made the blog again!)

More mischief with Abigail.
Poor Peyton - your brother gets to have birthdays too....
Nighttime geocaching with Cubbie and Little SmileyLion
The whole nighttime caching crew.
Aunt Mandy with baby Carter. Super Cheeks!

And back home on JetBlue. Only 30 minutes late this trip. Miss the family already.

Hey Cupcake

Happy Birthday to me! (EVERGLADES-FREE WARNING - the Everglades is mentioned briefly in this post - deal with it.) I've never been one to advertise my birthday but I must admit that I do celebrate it and try to enjoy it like anyone deserves to with a whole lot of "it's my birthday so I'm going to do whatever I want". Of course I've always felt that a mother has every reason to celebrate that day as well considering the work they put in.

If you're keeping track I'm 37. Which is pretty good considering the doctors didn't think I would survive through my first Christmas. I was born with something of a superpower in that I could vomit across the room thanks to a cinched pyloric valve. I survived, as you may have noticed and have enjoyed 36 Christmases/Saturnalias/Hanukkahs since.

Just for fun - here's a look back at a few memorable birthdays (or the ones I have pictures of).

1977 - I'm the bushy-haired one enjoying Dr. Seuss' The Lorax on reel-to-reel. A movie that had an impression on me and yet continues to stress me out. "Unless"? What did it mean? I could have understood "Rosebud" but "Unless" was to abstract for me. Regardless, I speak for the trees as well as the metaphorical Barbaloots and Swamee Swams.

1979 - I hate clowns and yet celebrated my 9th birthday at McDonald's. Now I only go to McDonald's to cure the common cold. It works. Sister Tara is in the back in a Battlestar Galactica shirt. Sister Mandy trying to hog the spotlight and sister Tiffany stylin' in a McDonalds hat which she would trade in a few years later for an employees hat at the same place. As would I for $2.39/hour.

1980 - Continued the fast food themed birthday's by celebrating at Burger King and got a really cool Pac-Man glass and several Star Wars people. Times were good.

1987 - Thinking all day that everyone had forgotten my birthday - I decided birthdays were awful and cruel and I would never celebrate another. Later that night I was surprised to find my girlfriend had organized a cow-themed surprise party. I was relieved but now hate surprises.

1988 - Spent my 18th at Penn State during my freshman year where I took in my first college football game (89,000 people in attendance) and was later talked down off the roof of my dorm by a a resident advisor who thought I was going to jump when in fact I was just throwing pumpkins. Kids don't try this at home. Go to college and try it. I didn't drink then and still rarely do, but I ended up in the hospital that night with a concussion after running down a water soaked hallway, sliding and landing on my head. Kids don't try this. 1997 - Enjoyed this one in sunny Bradenton, Florida with a friendly squirrel who was interested in the box of cookies and cupcakes I had received from home. This may be the start of what others assumed to be my love for squirrels. I don't think people appreciate them enough, but I don't love them. Or at least not like I love cupcakes. Still, my niece has found every type of nick-nack with a squirrel on it to have her mom buy and send. And I love them all.

1998 - The traditional birthday during the mid to late 90's included a trip to the Gould's Orchard pumpkin patch in upstate New York. This was during the "stache" years and was just days before I pulled my snowbird routine and drove back to Florida for the winter.
1999 - Let them eat cupcakes! Who doesn't like cupcakes? My birthday request for 2007 was simply to have all of the nieces and nephews eating cupcakes on my birthday. (I'll post if they send pictures.) But here is Abigail stuffing her face as a baby. Start the bad habits early! (Note to Tara - 2 month old babies are too young for actual cupcakes - try pureeing it.)

2000 - The whole family was together for the big 30 and the one thing I remember above all else is watching the little sister and then boyfriend (and now husband) get into a scuffle, lock into combat like two sumo wrestlers and actually tumble down a hill like two raccoons in an over sized Wal-Mart bag. Good times.

2005 - Niece Estelle shares the same birthday and so in '05 we all trekked out to find a geocache I had hidden under a boardwalk on White Horse Beach in Massachusetts. The cache - called "The Siren of Sea" was buried under the sand during a storm back in the winter of '07.

2006 - My first birthday in another hemisphere. Ma-le and I spent a few days traveling along the coast in Ecuador, stopping in the port city of Salinas and desperately looking for Sangria which was the only thing I had hoped for. But the Ecuadorian presidential elections were on that same day and no alcohol could be served for 3 days prior to or during the election (a punishable offense that could and often does lead to incarceration). The day was redeemed when Pia and Johnny Garcia (Ma-Le's parents) had a Frutilla Cake waiting when we arrived back in Guayaquil. It was delicious. (And aren't they cute?) 2007 - Today I'm heading over to Fort Lauderdale like I do every week and then in the afternoon I'm heading into the Everglades National Park's Shark Valley. I've been just about every where else so this will be my birthday treat. Ma-Le's in Ecuador for a few more weeks so I will have to eat all of the cupcakes and lick the bowl. mmmm.