Upon Further Review - The Lesser Scaup?

As my friend and I approached the wetland, we could see activity near the water, mostly obscured by a perimeter of tall cattails. As we ascended an artificial rocky berm that formed the bounds of this human made wetland we could see an armada of floating ducks and we both responded with an excited “scaups!” and then danced around as if we had just scored a touchdown.

Shouting while birding is not recommended but neither of us had seen a Lesser Scaup (Aythya affinis), so it was hard to contain our excitement. There were around 400 of the birds paddling the small 20-acre wetland.
For those of us that maintain a “Life List” of bird species we have seen, checking one off is a big deal. For some it’s enough to simply see a bird fly over head but I like to watch and observe them, photograph them as much as possible. In doing so I notice different behaviors, color patterns and habitats and I have a record of when I took the picture. I often forget from season to season.

We left the marsh and the raft of birds, pleased that we had spotted not only a new species for the life list but an abundance of them.

When I returned to the car something didn’t seem right. Scaups are found in Broward County, Florida from December through February. Males are black and white with a blue beak – check. Size of a Mallard – Check. I looked at the photos on the Audubon Guides Bird app. Uh-oh. Scaups are white and gray across the back. Time out. I scrolled down to similar species. We need a booth review. I began pouring over the dozens of pictures I had taken of the “scaups” and noticed these had a white ring on the bill and when the neck is outstretched has a burgundy ring around the neck.

Upon further review – the call is over turned – We have a Ring-necked Duck (Aythya collaris)! A new species for my life list. Score!

Ants in Your Pants

The Red Imported Fire Ant (Solenopsis invicta) was accidentally introduced to the United States in either Mobile, Alabama or Pensacola, FL between 1933-1945. They inadvertently hitchhiked along with imported goods from Brazil and have since spread across many of the southern states, including Florida. They often create large nest mounds of soil, inhabited by thousands of the insects. When disrupted, the first ant to encounter a threat to their home emits a pheromone, alarming the rest of the colony which then defend the nest by all stinging the intruder with vengeance.

Before MaLe's return to Ecuador, we visited the Florida Keys, driving the length of the Overseas Highway from Key Largo down to Key West where we enjoyed the Southernmost point in the Continental US (marked by this black/yellow/red thing),

the 57 "Hemingway Cats" occupying the late writer's historic if not tragically dumpy home

the over hyped Mallory Square and a fantastic sunset over Florida Bay.


But no sendoff sunset is complete without sitting on a mound of fire ants. With only a glowing segment of sun remaining as it submerged into the sea, a frantic MaLe began hoping around, swatting at her back and cursing in Spanish (several words that I am familiar with). I helped brush as many off as I could and pleaded with her to move, but regretfully she was only listening in Spanish at this point and continued to stand in the mound of ants while peeling off clothing. Eventually she understood and moved, but not before being bitten literally from head to toe but the rotten little ormegas.

Fire ant bites are nasty and leave a zit-like swelling for a few days. It's not pleasant. She was calmed by sundown and you'd never know by this picture what she had just endured.

This afternoon it was back to work for me with a trip into the sweltering 98 degree Everglades. As always, I joined my adventurers on the airboat and as we cruised along the well-populated alligator lake, I realized I was being peppered with tiny insects. I looked towards the bow and realized a raft of fire ants had made their way on board and were now being blown on me! I signaled to the airboat captain to stop the boat, which he misinterpreted as go faster, and more and more ants began to fleck my khaki shirt. ANTS! I yelled, but my full-on-freakout fell on deaf ears as the Cadillac engine continued to power the airboats airplane propeller and create just enough noise to drown out what I assumed would soon turn to my panicked sobs.

Fire Ants have the amazing ability to create a mass of ants, or a raft to protect them during floods. Water comes up, they gather in a ball and are magically transported to a new home. In this case - the airboat and eventually on to me. I survived with amazingly only one bite. Maybe the speed in which we traveled carried away the pheromone message to attack. Either way, MaLe and I both survived our ant encounters. Now that the rainy season is here, you gotta watch out for the ants who are constantly shifting their homes to drier ground.
(because it was requested...the MaLe Meez)

Come See the Albino Raccoon!

My mom used to say "you're only disappointed by your expectations". I'm annoyed by my expectations. It's 2007. Where are the flying cars?

When you build things up in your mind you generate a potential experience. The longer you go without the actual experience, the more elaborate the mental imagery. This is dangerous in that the disappointment can be so great as to scar you for long after the actual experience. You might think I'm referring to Pirates of the Caribbean 3: At Wits End, but I'm not.

The Calusa Nature Center is a 100+ acre nature preserve with a fantastic Planetarium, great cypress swamp nature trails and interpretive displays of reptiles, mammals, birds and insects of southern Florida.

Years ago, the Nature Center was a remote destination with little in the way of development around it. Today the area has been enveloped by Wal-Mart, Home Depot, Chik-filet and BPs. While the nature center has retained Independence and still sits in stark contrast to the corporate environmental takeover, they have acquiesced to one form of consumer attraction, the flashing digital sign. In fairness, the local church has done the same but either way it seems odd to see "To greed, all nature is insufficient" in flashing red lights at the church and this outside the nature center.

I drive past this sign once a week and it tempts with promises of venomous snakes and other novelties, but it's the ALBINO RACCOON that sparks the imagination.

Of course in retrospect I can't remember for the life of me what I expected before we actually went, but it was certainly more than a ghostly, maskless raccoon pacing in a tiny dilapidated cage.

I feel less disappointment and in truth more shame as if I had just paid to see the "Lobster Boy" or "Bat Boy" etc. This poor creature would certainly not last more than a few days in the wild without pigmented fur, but captivity might be worse. Who's to say.

This blog entry isn't ending well. Hmm. Well what did you expect?

Aqua Roulette or Why I Hate the Weather Man

Previously on JunglePete's Everglades Adventure -

I don't know why subscribers received a recap of the the first ten blogs. I had nothing to do with it, but apparently at least one of you enjoyed them again like fond childhood memories of H.R.Puffenstuff and Ooops All Berries Captain Crunch. You liked it so much the first time, you had to have more.

The 9th Florida Panther was struck and killed just off of the interstate on Tuesday. The record for vehicle caused fatalities was 11 in 2006. I would imagine that record will be broken.

Funny thing about forecasts. This afternoon I went to a speech by Jim Cantore of The Weather Channel.

He's the guy on TWC usually standing somewhere around the gulf of Mexico when a massive hurricane is about to hit. Never mind the storm surge, the 75 mph winds and the shingles flying by. He wants you to know it's dangerous!

He was announcing the 2007 Hurricane Report for about 500 members of the Fort Myers Chamber of Commerce. (chamber meetings....and you thought Red Algae was fascinating!) His estimates were a bit more tempered than the official report of 17 major storms for this year. He predicts 10. Of course last year they predicted 15 and there were 0 so the margin of error seems to be +/- 15.

His message was that hurricanes are still impossible to predict. His goal is to make sure people "get out of the way". Except for him. And despite the fact that it's hard to know where they will hit. So really just be prepared. Evacuate if you need to and don't if you don't have to. Depends on where the storm will go. Predictions say north into the gulf but it could turn at any moment. Keep watching your TV and if Jim Cantore is outside of your house you probably should have evacuated.

In 2005 after Katrina, leery Texas residents evacuated in droves as Hurricane Rita bore down on the Lone Star State. (Don't mess with Texas does not apply to acts of God.) More people lost their lives on the evacuation routes than from the actual hurricane. Moral of the story? Don't evacuate? Or maybe just don't watch the weather channel. It may cause freak outs.

If traffic was bad with millions of people on the roads during "the season", imagine what it will be like with 6 million people trying to go north. Or east if Jim Cantore tells us to. Or just get away from the storm or don't evacuate. It's really up to you. Just stay tuned. It's all too confusing and really a game of aqua roulette. Where will the rain and storm surge hit? Spin the wheel of doom!

Typically we get about 12 inches of rain from November to May (aka the dry season) Over the last 6 months, south Florida has experienced one of the worst droughts and until Monday we have had 3.5 inches of rain. Fires have scorched millions of acres across the state and many were hoping for a tropical storm to bring rain. Fortunately the rainy season has begun and the official start of the hurricane season begins June 1st. We have received nearly 7 inches of rain since Monday which has suppressed many fires and extinguished the chants for a tropical storm.

As meteorological forecasting technology becomes more sophisticated we seem to have less accurate forecasting. Maybe it is just me. Personally I like how they predict weather in Ecuador - with the weather rock seen below attached to the green rope.

If the rock is swinging - it is windy
If the rock is wet - it is raining
If the rock is violently shaking - there is an earthquake.
and so on...

We can't predict very well where hurricanes will hit until they are far too close. We have too many people living directly in the paths of hurricanes. Here at Casa Pedro y Ma-Le we're preparing our hurricane plan, but the best prepared person has to prepare for the least prepared person as well, because when water, gas, food and other necessities are in short supply, the unprepared look to the prepared. It makes me a bit nervous.

I have lived in Florida for 28 years of my life and have yet to experience a hurricane. (Got a tropical storm in Vermont in 1998 though!). Here's hoping I still don't this year. As for the 17 predicted major storms? Let's hope the weather man is wrong as usual.....

Snakes on a Roller Coaster

Ok - That's a ridiculous premise. But poisonous snakes dangling from trees? That might just cause public panic.

On Sunday, MaLe and I decided to honor my mom by doing a day full of dangerous things. Busch Gardens Africa in Tampa, Florida is a zoo in some respects but has evolved into a first class theme park with some of the best roller coasters in the world. I learned early on that to get MaLe to go on the big roller coasters, I would have to trick her into thinking she was getting on something else or simply not let her see what we were standing in line for. SheikRa (the ride not the singer) is a fairly new roller coaster that is the first "Dive" coaster in the U.S. meaning you plunge at a 90 degree angle for nearly 200 feet. As the coaster quickly cranked up to the top and finally leveled out at 200 feet above Tampa, MaLe looked down and said "I didn't know it did this!"

That trick worked twice.

It was a fun and exhausting day and as the sun began to go down and people began to leave the park we headed for the exit. MaLe made one final pit stop and as I waited, my attention turned to a Crown Palm about 30 feet tall and in the fronds (leaves) I noticed three snakes "sunning" themselves. Red, yellow - then black....that's the pattern of a Coral Snake right? red on black - no coming back? No. red on black ok for Jack? I think so. Red on yellow - kill a fellow. These were poisonous Coral Snakes! As I began to stare at the snakes in the tree a crowd began to gather, all pointing up at the snakes. And suddenly a bird flew in, perched near a snake and plummeted to the ground - stone dead. Visitors became nervous, a few yelling and shouting and yet still standing under the snakes. Busch Gardens employees made panicked calls to unseen supervisors and a dead bird lay splattered on the pavement.

I don't know what killed the bird. I know it wasn't a poisonous snake bite. As MaLe and I walked away from the hysteria I would like to think I caused I pointed out each Crown Palm had three fake Coral Snakes tied to the palm fronds. Apparently they are intended to cause birds to think twice before roosting there. Apparently it can also have deadly reactions that in the Ornithological world are known as "fatal freak outs".

I can understand the confusion. They looked real despite the lack of movement. What I found most disconcerting was earlier in the day, a nine year old boy with a mullet (the hair style, not the fish) pointed out to his dad a Tiger. The dad astutely noticed the Tiger had seemingly lost the stripes. They marveled at this beautiful animal with a regal mane, giant paws and a solid tawny brown pelt from head to tail before wandering off. It was of course a Lion.

Even more disappointing was the man who recognized the skinny little "monkeys" peering around atop the entrance to the underground tunnels. They were of course Meerkats. If he had just hummed a few bars of "In the Jungle" they might have accompanied him in a sing-a-long.

The sad thing is people are dumb and just don't care. Monkey was close enough. Tiger made a dad proud of his kid. As Bill would say - If ignorance is Bliss - these people were ecstatic. And for that they may have had a little more fun than I.

As for Snakes on a Roller Coaster? Maybe next time. I just won't tell MaLe.

Flat Cats

A recent article in the Naples News detailed the death of the 8th Florida Panther this year. It was suggested that at this pace the cats were set to "demolish" last year's record of 11 road kills for the year.

The 3 year old cat was hit 10 miles east of the National Park. CLICK HERE for my custom map of every Florida Panther fatality since 1972. You can see that the only two of the Florida Panthers have been hit in the area that this one was hit on Tuesday. The suggestion is that there are more panthers and they have needed to expand their range. (Probably slightly true) This concerns people. Imagine Florida Panthers in your backyard! (One had "menaced" a goat farm...not the same goat farm i visited though). It should be noted that there have been 16 fatalities caused by (Pumas, Cougars, Mountain Lions) since 1890 in the US and Canada combined! There are an average of 6 attacks on humans a year across this range and there have never been attacks in Florida in this time.

What people are not considering is that we are in the midst of one of our worst droughts ever in Florida. No water means the cats need to follow their food source. Deer, pigs, armadillo seek out water too and where they go, the cats may follow. There is simply not enough water out there. Combine the lack of water with the serious fire situation, we have fires popping up every day across Florida and already over 40,000 acres of Everglades have burned. So is it possible that lack of water, fire and food is pushing the cats out of the dried up swamps?

With 6 million people in southern Florida now, it must be difficult for the cats to not come into contact with humans. And amazingly it's still rare. But sadly, like shark and alligator attacks, the media sensationalizes stories and the sheep that humans tend to be take the bait. If only they would stop and consider, but I guess everything the media says is true.....

Es Un Chivito Lindo

Sometimes you get gators, sometimes you get goats.

I had a scheduled tour today, which means up at 6 am and out of the house before the sun comes up. Bright-eyed and bushy bearded - I ambled off to work, eager to get back to the Everglades. MaLe and I had explored in the Picayune State Forest of the Everglades on Saturday, but I had not led a tour in 2 weeks which may be why I've been crabby.

So I picked up the tour van and headed out to find my travelers. It was a beautiful morning. Sunny. 70 degrees and breezy. A great day for gators and a great day to be in the 'glades. But my travelers never showed. Dejected, I drove back to drop the van off with the boss and headed back home.

On my way home from work at 7:50 am, I passed by a place that is affectionately known as the "Million Dollar Goat Farm". There is a CVS pharmacy to the west of the goat farm and a Walgreens Pharmacy to the east. (This is the standard for every other intersection in Florida. Can't have one without the other.) A Burger King is across the street and an apartment complex towers above the goat farm to the north. Developers have just about succeeded in building on or paving over everything here in Fort Myers and Lee County and yet here remains, on what is no doubt a very pricey piece of land, a huge goat farm. And today the goats were out in force.

Now I'm not suggesting that goats are anything special. Rumor has it they are destructive little...monsters, but seeing hundreds of goats where a developer has no doubt considered placing a 7-11, Juicy Lucy's or a drive-thru ophthalmologist kind of lifted my spirits. Someone owns that property. Someone has held off the developers and someone has left hundreds of cute goats to roam about and leave an otherwise unsightly landscape somewhat wild. And for the record, goats ain't native to Florida. They're just damn cute.

Feeling Crabby

I know I've been up to something these last few days....why do they seem a blur? Cinco de Mayo? No. Interviewing for our new guides? Maybe. Red Tide affecting my breathing? I suppose. I just don't know. I guess I've just been feeling crabby. MaLe and I spotted this coprophagic (poop-eating) mangrove crab while walking the boardwalk out near Fort Myers Beach. They're about the size of a half-dollar.

Maybe I haven't been angry enough to write. It's ok to write when you're angry, but never write when you are tired. I have a tour Monday morning so I best get to bed. More Everglades Adventures mañana

JQ - Jungleboy Quarterly

It's been 3 months of nonsense and it's time to recap!

After leaving Vermont on January 29th, I've seen and done quite a few spectacular things and know the best is yet to come. We have 54 subscribers, not including dingleberry@redsoxnerd.com (one of my brother-in-law Jim's fake email addresses) and have readers in 24 countries. The goal, is to improve the educational level of the entries while making things simple enough so my sister can understand (she knows which one), increase the sophistication of the humor while adding more poop jokes and get an editor so no one has to endure my bad grammar anymore. Ruth won the grammar correction contest with 44 corrections. Thanks Ruth!

I've received a lot of comments and questions and thought I'd finally answer them all here if possible. I have to paraphrase or simply make up all that I can't remember.

Q1 - Is it a good idea to write when you are angry?
A1 - Sure! I'm angry a lot. And happy a lot too. I've been saddled with the burden of knowledge and hampered with the curse of stupidity. Two great traits that don't taste so good together. There's a lot of frustrating, annoying, crazy things out there that get me fired up and not only does writing focus the energy, it helps formulate possible ideas on how to solve the issues. Or encourages others to solve them. Or just simply pokes fun at it. Which ever comes first.

Q2 - Is your Meez single?
A2 - Quite possibly the most disturbing question. The answer is no. I hate to break anyone's heart or psychotic delusions, but my Meez is just a cartoon facsimile that has a cartoon facsimile girlfriend that is often offscreen. The cartoon girlfriend has to be careful that the cartoon agents from the Department of Homeland Security do not find her.

Q3 - What's your favorite smell?
A3 - Orange Blossoms and/or Methane

Q4 - Is Red Drift Algae always so boring?
A4 - Yes

Q5 - Aren't you scared of the Alligators?
A5 - Funny thing about that. When I was a kid I was terrified. The media sensationalizes animal encounters, often alligator encounters and people end up fearing them more than they should. Respect them. Give them distance. Don't feed them and you will be fine. They are fearful of people 99% of the time. This is a terrible statistic, but there were more traffic fatalities in Lee County last week than there have been fatalities caused by Alligators in all of Florida since 1950. Only 19 people in 57 years is not bad. Unless you are one of the 19.

Q6 - Are you going to shave your cat again this year?
A6 - It's 85 and humid right now on April 30th. That cat needs to be shaved. No one asked this question. I just wanted to post this picture.

Q7 - How many Peeps did you eat in the video?
A7 - Only 5. I had to eat as many as Will did. And yes my stomach hurt afterwards.

Q8 - Was Will actually bitten by a bat?
A8 - The poor kid. In September of 2005 I led a group of homeschool kids and their parents to the Dorset Bat Cave in Vermont. During the next weeks class Will told me he had been bitten by a rabid bat. I dismissed him, thinking he was making up the story. No one had been bitten by a rabid bat in Vermont in many decades. Later someone showed me a headline in the Bennington Banner that explained that a local boy had been bitten by a rabid bat! It was a scary story and really a rarity. To his credit, the 9 year old Will told reporters that it was scary but he still appreciated bats. Cool kid. And he's a Peep eater.

Q9 - Do airboats ever flip over?
A9 - This was asked a few weeks ago and the answer was very rarely. A few days later, an airboat flipped, sending passengers into "alligator infested waters". The water is very low and apparently the boat had a mechanical failure, rendering the driver nothing but a passenger. They hit a clump of sawgrass and over they went. The "alligator infested water" is a perfect example of media hysteria. There was maybe one alligator within a 300 yard radius and wanted nothing to do with the accident. The driver suffered a broken collarbone and passengers had cuts and scrapes. That is the first accident I have heard about in all of the time of been around the everglades. Very rare.

Q10 - Is your criticism of exotic species analogous to your feelings on illegal immigrants?
A10 - Apparently you don't know who I'm dating. (Edited after post - My inarticulate point is that MaLe is a fervent supporter of dignified immigration laws here in the U.S. as am I. She in fact has a tourist visa and is here legally, lest anyone misunderstood me. Her Meez on the other hand is here illegally.)

Q11 - How do you get someone off the phone when you're done talking to them?
A11 - Excellent question. Some people can chat forever and the old excuse - "My show is on!" no longer works if you have Tivo. Kate and Ashley (not the twins) refuse to get Tivo just so they can still use that line. Or they don't want to talk to me. But I like to use "the cat is puking on the carpet!" Which is often unfortunately true and the reason he needs to be shaved.

Q12 - If you could be Pinocchio or Peter Pan, which would you choose?
A12 - No one asked me this but it's still an interesting question. Peter Pan could fly but he wore tights. Pinocchio wore little red shorts and had a slight case of wood rot but he had a pet cricket and if he got hungry he could eat him. So I would go with the Gippetto's kid.

Q13 - Is there an Easter Bunny?
A13 - Absolutely. I once dressed as the Easter Bunny and after trying to explain this to a 9-year old, she became very confused. The Easter Bunny has a cadre of lackeys he uses to distract kids while he hides Easter eggs. There really is no other explanation. But yes there is a real Easter Bunny and yes I pretended to be him for a day.

Pete and Mom - assisting the Easter Bunny for a day.

Looking forward to the next three months of adventure. Keep the comments and questions coming.

That's all folk!

Get My Drift?

Imagine one day you go into your bathroom and there's a patch of mildew growing on the shower tiles. Gross right? But it's part of nature. You wipe it away and think nothing more of it. But the next morning not only has the mildew returned, it's now covering twice the area as the day before. So you clean it with a non-toxic, environmentally friendly, orange-blossom scented cleaner and hope it doesn't happen again. But guess what happens the next morning? The entire bathroom is covered in mildew and now it smells like rotten eggs, peaches and dog breath. What would you do now? (If you're eating breakfast and have a weak stomach, I probably should have stopped you at "mildew".)

Red Drift Algae is a naturally occurring red-brown seaweed found in warm shallow waters in the Gulf of Mexico. It washes up from time to time and the tide takes it away a few days later. A few years ago, a massive Red Drift Algae bloom occurred off the Florida coast, later piling up on beaches several feet high. From Sanibel to Naples, the seaweed, which had trapped unfortunate sea creatures like crabs, sea slugs and seashells of all sorts began to decompose along with the dead sea life it ensnared. It smelled. Horrifically. And the sight of the seaweed all along the pristine coastline had tourists appalled. They couldn't just step over the piles as they might a homeless person in the street, they would have to walk 40 feet over the stuff in some places and then swim through it once they reached the surf. Nasty messes like this belonged on the cigarette butt-lined street corners and litter filled storm drainage ditches. Not on the beach!

Some towns brought in earth movers to clean the stuff up. Some towns said it was natural and left it. And some tourists naturally left. No one did the rational thing until it happened again. A year later the algae drifted up again and finally someone asked why. Why had mildew invaded your hypothetical bathroom? Asking and answering that question might fix your problem. Well - my problem that I put in your head. But anyway. Scientists were being enlisted and town meetings were planned to ask why this was happening and what could be done. (About the algae, not the mildew problem I put in your head).

Nutrient runoff from agricultural areas is usually the first to be blamed for the problems in the Everglades. So it was a natural scapegoat here. In some sense deservedly so. All of the excess nitrogen and phosphorus that is used to make things grow better, along with cow poop often washes into the Everglades watershed or downstream and into the ocean. Red Drift Algae thrives with these added nutrients so there's the problem right? The massive blooms occurred right after the busy hurricane seasons of 2004 and 2005 when trillions of gallons of rainwater overflowed Lake Okeechobee and were sent out to see. The Gulf of Mexico was warm, fresh water mixed with salt water and the nutrients created the perfect Red Drift Algae soup. But not so fast with the blame. While much of the nutrients washed out to sea could be blamed on the agricultural areas, scientists were able to trace the nitrogen back to its main source. Sewage runoff from leaky septic tanks (are you still eating? I warned you.) and waste water that had not been 100% treated was found to be the main culprit. Water treatment plants are not required to release 100% treated water, but "mostly treated waste water" is not something you'll see on the tourism brochure. What it comes down to is warmer temperatures in the Gulf of Mexico, possibly closed by global warming (or "warmings" if you chose the plural form as our President does), a variety of human caused nutrient inputs and poorly managed water supplies.

How easy is this to fix? We'll see over the next ten years. But it must be fixed, because no one wants to swim in massive floating mats of stinky seaweed (even with a hint of peach smell), and the supposed lack of risk may become a health concern sooner than later. (More on that when the flesh-eating bacteria become a media sensation). It's funny how people are not concerned with environmental issues until it has an economic impact. Businesses reacted only when the tourists began to leave.

The underlying issue is most tragic. The seabeds that that Red Drift Algae naturally grows on have become smothered with the stuff. From the coastline to at least 30 miles out, there is a layer of algae covering the sea beds and blocking the sunlight for a multitude of living things under the sea. It's not enough to simply clean the beaches or leave the algae and let "nature take care of it". If we don't solve this problem, a huge portion of the gulf will die and the pristine, seashell-lined beaches people come from the around the world to visit will be no more. Get my drift?

Tomorrow - The big three month review!

Noise Violation

The lease agreement for this apartment complex/hive is fairly strict when it comes to noise. After 9 pm you need to keep it down. No loud music, no barking dogs no use of jack hammers. I first heard the odd noise about two months ago. It was a distant, monotonous, mechanical trill that sounded as if they were doing road work out on US-41 about 1/2 mile away. I ignored it. It was the type of sustained, drone that I typically require to fall asleep. The noise continued for the next few weeks, occasionally becoming louder, sometimes occurring into the early hours of the morning before dawn. It occurred to us that it might be an animal. A treefrog? an owl? Try making a low, guttural "waaaaaaaaaaaaa" noise and that's pretty much it.

It wasn't an issue until my sister Tara, brother in-law Brian and baby Peyton came for a visit. It has rained all of 1/10th of an inch since I arrived in Fort Myers in January. No sooner did their plane touch down and the rain clouds rolled in, dumping over an inch of much needed rain across the area over the next three days. And then came the ungodly noise. As darkness fell two nights ago, the once unobtrusive noise rose to an unending cacophony of ever loudening, monotonous notes, bombarding every open window. Closing all windows dulled the ever present sound. It was time to find out who the culprit was.

With flashlight in hand, MaLe and I set out around the otter pond in the center of our hive where the sounds seemed to emanate from. The sounds radiated from dozens of points which seemed to be in the trees, in the water, on the buildings. The chorus was singing from every available vantage point and as we drew closer to each individual point, our well-cloaked, mysterious callers would cease, drawing our attention to more remote callers and making pinpointing the culprits all the more difficult. After encircling the pond and spooking a Yellow-crowned Night Heron (aka Quwak, because of the similar noise they make),we spotted one huge hopper along the water's edge. Mystery mostly solved. It's a toad! These softball-sized beasts apparently were taking advantage of the recent rains and calling to every Bufonid from here to the Everglades. The species in particular is the exotic Giant Toad Bufo marinus (aka Marine or Cane Toad). They can weigh more than three pounds and females can lay a string of up to 20,000 eggs. Males have a rudimentary ovary and have the ability to lay eggs if their testes are damaged. (stop giggling little sister) Eggs hatch between 2 and 7 days. Adults eat our native frogs and toads. They can also secrete (or "shoot") a fairly toxic liquid from their skin as a defense which can be fatal to small dogs....I should encourage the owners of the Pomeranian that barks all day to try one. I mean have the dog try one. Oh heck they should all try one.

The chorus had calmed last night to a normal decibel, but the pond monsters are still calling. (click here to hear one) Our little apartment pond is far more productive then I would have ever imagined. Who knows what we'll discover next out there.

Please Harass the Iguanas

#241 on my list of things I want to do has been completed! How many times have you seen the sign "Don't Harass the Wildlife"? What a drag. I know, I know. I'm a wildlife biologist and I should respect the wildlife, but just once I'd love to do something malicious and rotten and have the permission to do it.

Wish granted. The people of Boca Grande hate the invasive Iguanas and they give permission to harass them! How exciting! And if verbal permission was not enough they've granted it in writing! In a brochure! Wohoo! It would seem that back in the 80's some unthinking pet owner decided to release a few on the west coast island of Boca Grande in Florida and over the last 25+ years, the population of Black Spiny Tail Iguanas (Ctenosaura similis) has grown to a reported 12,000+. They naturally range from Mexico to Columbia and the sub-tropical environment here suites them well. They feed on bird eggs, destroy the dunes by burrowing and get into people's homes (and cars). They're destructive little monsters....and they're spreading. They've naturally made it to the mainland and have been transported to other local islands.

So the Lee County Public Resources Division puts out a brochure that spells out the problem and offers a few solutions, including my favorite, #9 - "Harass iguanas at every opportunity". It's a fantastic solution and fun for the kids. By Lee County and Webster's Dictionary's standard, this is what I'm permitted to do -

• (1) : to annoy persistently


• (2) : to create an unpleasant or hostile situation for especially by uninvited and unwelcome verbal or physical conduct

The first one MaLe and I spotted was perched at the peak of a hollowed out Sable Palm (middle of the picture below). My first chance to harass! I shook that tree like a hurricane, sending my reptilian foe scrambling down towards safety and spooking a bird from the cavity. Not to worry - it was a European Starling and I could very well have the right to harass them as well.

The next one we spotted in a more posh section of town was resting quietly in the shade of an exotic Banyan Tree - no doubt planted by the property owner. We rolled up on the invasive iguanid and shouted some unpleasant verbosity at the perplexed perp, who bobbed his head in what I can only assume was terror before he/she went back to napping.

The final harassment of the day was a two-fer. Spotting a 4-foot long lizard basking in an undeveloped lot, I parked the car and began walking closer to take a picture. Wishing to avoid the paparazzi, the illegal lizard scrambled away and feeling I had not had the opportunity to give appropriate "hostile conduct" to the foul beast, I gave chase, spurring a second iguana to flee in fear as well. I hastened my pursuit, but pulled up short with a tweaked hammy. I'll accept this incident as sufficient harassment - and never chase lizards without stretching first again.

There was a local that was quoted regarding the problem saying "Iguanas are not human. They do not deserve humane treatment," resident Richard Zellner wrote. "As far as I am concerned, they can be burned, shot and mutilated."

I did in fact chase iguanas today. To make a point. They are invasive and are causing problems (actually because it was fun, but kids, don't harass wildlife). But they are still animals. They have done nothing wrong other than being born on an island their parents were not native to. I'm all for removing invasives. Including these lizards, but we must find a proper way to do it and as humanely as possible. Being human is not a requisite for being treated humanely.

No iguanas were injured during the course of our afternoon on Boca Grande. But a few were mildly harassed. This post is dedicated to Carol H. who is welcome to take a few Iguana's south with her when she moves her and her family to Costa Rica this summer. They travel well. (The iguanas, not her family...well maybe the family travels well. How would I know?)

For those of you in "the know" and have Irony Detectors buzzing and flashing, I will get to the story of the non-invasive Green Tree Iguana that someone I know may have accidentally "lost" on Boca Grande years ago.....but not today.